Thursday, March 19, 2009

Famous!!! Have I returned!!!!

ALresdy you are thinking my famous minions that I have inot the world of sky apotheorisiesed, but now youy are knowing that Blog of Nate before Purto Rico I may be but I am ever ther person of still now on this earht to be being!!!! SOrry I am for my silence but many ,miles of places have I been in the now of the world knowing ansd seing and soime thinsg am I very happy to tell of, but others am I now wodnrng how they could be said to be so sad in the state of the world fo beoing!!!!

Now should you kno wthat rleataives have i located an d happy i am to know and be knowing of them!! Let me into the world of knowjng and hpapinesss let you!! Knowing amI now that I have seen movie fo film of the moive that from book is now movie that is film named of called "Eveyrybting is Illiminated!!!!!" And in this vert y ifne film of movie is dog by name of Sammy Davis Junior Junior, but more impartantly i s man who must my cousin be becuase of his also very evident commmand of the commandeing Engilhs languages now commandingly knowing as am I the pPied Pipeer of Eglish as a Secondary Language fo Knowing, that i shte joy I feel as I am this amazoing surely cousin of mine seeing in the film of the movie I am seeing. This man my surely of him he is cousoin is knwoing fo the very imprressive wordss in which he says thing slike he is feeling very PROXIMAL now that he is knwoing peopelk eand let me must say ot my minions that to you i Too am feeling very PROXIMAL this is hiow the closennss of intamacty is working in all its PROXIMALITY, thayt is how must I feel in the knowing of the proxoimals.

Too does my sure to be cousin ssay is somewthing is the very finest of quality that it is PREMIUM AND this is mustly the way that I feel about life, this movie fo the film , my entrails when I am hppay, and about family and whit e bread and the spreading of it with margarine that I did noty know was butter until you knew to teall me, that is how PREMIUM life can be when we are at the orgasim of PROXIMLAITY, please nnknow that family blog know this is so I am only tje metaphoriciallly speaking when the orgasuim word I am using in such proximality of mpremium saize.

Bu tnow I must to less thjan PREMIUM subject address meyelf leaving me not at all felling that PRIOXIAML
at all fine freiands of the feathered as you all are to me!!! Last week am I sitting in cafe of overproiced foodstiffs that are food to me and I look across the far crosses of the room of the cafe and I see a sign, neigh, banner that proclaims that PROSCIUTTO IS KING!!! AND beside the self of who I am I am at thew tiome feelinmg that is how I prcoalim mys cproximal self!!! HAM IS KING, i OWNDER ??? This is not to the being of reality is this I cannot see to myeslf that is can be proximnal in the vry lesast!!!! It makes me feela si if Rooss and Dinaanna and the Five Jackoinss ar enot the Barry Maniows of the World of Knoiwing that Iw as thinking , if my drift you can seem to begetting!!! Sad ios the wordl fo hamsick royality if this is the wrodl that we know to be knwoing.

I must call KIng Glen to get onto case of Lionamn for the Country to know if ham is making roadins for the borders fo knwoing something that we must know to keep the Lionmen of trhe Country safe for the 51 st State of before Purieot Riico that we must be knwoiing !!!!!

Saturday, March 7, 2009


And now you are thinking that I am thinking the very same thoing that you are thiking!! That is it time to like Cosiun Williemelson be on the roadkill aggain, meating and grating, ironing the flesh with charissma that is mine and mine alones to be ironing onto people's flesh though wonnder I do about secnod and third degrees of burning, you would not want Mount Vesusiiviius on flesh so why do we wwant ironing of the knwn quantity of KOB on the flesh of felloewers? Latert famous days will we explroer of these mioghty tissues, for now we musyt about the bowling be talkinh for yes I am oin the roadklll again as bowler in bowling lanes of Oak Hills boweling this very afternoon of the Famous Saturday of our lives!! Yes, I am saynng this, and I am sayung this now to you in the very place to which yuo are being asaid!!!

Imagine pelase as i sit aat table to type in names of fewlo= bowelers and Iam wriitng the names of the the named and I am thinigkging now is time for world to knoe wme as I know me as ytou know me, so yes, you arer seeing me coming round the moutnainf when I came as I am typing out the very name of KING OF BLOGGING!!!! IN MY space of naming!!!????!!!! Is it awesomeness of my boweling or are world of bowelers knowing who they are knowing as they see me like I am Alec Boweldwin in New Oleewnans deli eating pastarami on rey as I sit beside him wondeerirng does he knwo?? Does he knwo who is by him sititng and not eatring his pastarami on rye but eating other sloppiyt sandwiches of unknwosn varierties fit for knings of delis and blwoigogng and boweling!!!!

Or is it hat thta shines and sparkles that is cauisg caoomotioin along wiht awesomeness of my boweling?? Hat of picture of whiuch you see above with othwr pictures of known quauntiietoes. let me simply saty that beside myslelf I could not be more for the kniowin anf trhe seeionfg of me as on the roadkill again wiht cosiin Willie Smeltson, this is for all of us to be knowing rhe klnowing of !!!!

And so shall I end: 129 am I bowleling which is seeming to be downright peropheral in all its pysthagoaaarian glory!!!!!!! Soon I am thiking I am boweling for dollars!!! Gourd is GRate is what i am thinkign!!! Proabbaly Berry Gordy is Gretate, too!!!! burt for me i am praying to gila monster that is hair of the rossdianan of the Five Jacksins!!!!

Saturday, February 28, 2009

King of Blogging Famous Music Playlist!!!!

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Famous!! Even More Daze!!!!

Feloowers and wondroues bloloogehrs of all the Nates of the world of bloofgegers, we are again together gatthered together (I am thinking mrowe and mroe that I am soundingg like early Boog of nater Jeff Chacuer form the Tales of Canterbruery, I loeved his speling too as I love mine as I come to yoiu live from the new Headwaters of the 51st State fo Natehood campagn for ascensuon to the heights fo Bloogfge of Nayehood campaijng!) We are all of loving it, are we not?

So of what ar wewe talking today my mighty band of naters! You are thingijg tthat is is now Lent for the noncusirng and nonmeateating minions, but my mighty bandof naters, for me it is still madri Grass as it is evry day inthe days of 51st State of Natehood before Puetro Rico! Why should we shrive like boring Episcoplains with their glutenfree pancakes and dribbly syrup when lfife is party, my migty band of friends of State of 51st Statehood! This is the where of where I am comiong from, you half to believe me oh Willie Nelsons of the Worlds of Bloogiogjng!

Yes, in the days fo my pre-incarnation of the curerent of State of 51st State of Natehood, I was known as a liver of life in the Croisannt City that Care Forgot to live in and around its streets eating myself into the size of at least Rhode Island statehood, thanks to likes of Wareren LeRuth and Suasan Spicer and that infernal Satan of Lunacy Emeril Lagasses, oh help me Jesus, if i did not get out of there, state of Montana I would now be, rack of lamb and mandarin orange sorbet and bread pudding washed down with Dum Perignot and overplenteous olde fashioneds, while the pants they were ever-expanding and, well, that is not what I am here ot taljk about this glorious day, my mighty bandsa of friends fo 51st, Luther Vandross is reminding me that there are other thinsg to talk about in my ears he is crooning, never too much...

Krewe Of Thoth I was a rider in in daze of the past past and I am King of St Charles Avenue, beauteous and nonbeateuos women and men are crying for all my plastic trash as if it is the mamnna from heaven and not just trashy plasrtic equivalent of Episcoplain panakces thrown in streets, no these fools of streets are cryuig out for cups and doubloons and black ratsw witht red demon eyes saved for uptown nuns and bouncy balls and litle brown naked plastic cherub babies and long ones and short nasty green ones and anything else up the sleeves of me athaty they are wanting cryign for. And generous breasts are bneing to me shown into one of which generosities at Lee Circle I am gently placing with gentlesss gentleeness a six foot long rubber snake fo which she is even more genreous!

But even thes eday sof heaven are but tiniest amount of shit in hot skillet (to borow from Miss Z of A) compared to plans that toda y I have for our plans of satehood! I am eveer the bihgger plans of thinkikng. Know you that there are kings of Krewes every year named, and no I am sorry to say that KOB was never so honored, but i am royalty apprecntice those days I am thinginng, but now as we all know thanks to rhondaa-apprenrtice and dnald trump video tapes styuding of Iam now ready for secret of Kinghood of Statehood! Funnest of other krewww not Thoth was night of Bacchhus on Napoleon Avenue in front of St ELizabeth HOme for Girls catching dozens of Bachus cups and waiting for King float, favoitre king of all being Dennis Quaid who other than I KInghood fo Natehood would be better, until I go to Bachcxhuss website and ee that 1974 king is that WIchita Lionman of King Hood Glenn Camel! Now this is apotheosuis of which I am talking about when about apotheiosis I am talkinhg about, that is the truith!

SO, yes, you see where I am going with need for notoreietry I am gaining: in recent past life regresion, I am seeing, yes, I am seeing that I am reinacrantion of KIng Glen himself, in the shower am I alwasy simngsing lionman for the country, by the time I get to felix, limestone cowboy, and galveston, even thouhg singigng last song is politically uncorrect, sad Iam dfor the city of lovely seafood eating.

You know where I am heading! King of bacchis will I be, strewing Napoleon AVnue with doubllons that say KIng of Nate on one side and flipper side sayign 51st STate of Natehood befrre Pueotrt Rico! The world will be our basket of bagels and Epsiicpolaisns pancxkaes! The almighty walls of the Blloegers of Nate-ing will fall like Jethro Tull in BIble when trunpets and kazzoos are blown by people of Israel and Knights of Nee!

Long Live King Glen before he was Me! (you see tthe rhyme, don't thee?)

Galveston, oh Galveston, I still hear your sea waves crashing
While I watch the cannons flashing
I clean my gums and dream of Galveston, (even though I am gum control advocate I will still seing song the way of the mighty preKingof Me, King Glen!!!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Famous! More Days!!!

Fellow people of trhe King! We are here again and you are excited as I am, the world is not at ends, becxause the Lif eof King is ongoing, jubliation could be a reslut of how you feel, that is what I am saying. You are thinking why does King of Blogging now sound more like Rverwend Al Green of Memphis Tennessesseessee instead of King that I am, well so am i, is it because I have been viewing many viewings of Fats Waller videos singing about Hineysuckles and BigFeets and Miss Behavin (have you met her), it gives entirely different sound to my usual urban legend way of communication in the usUAL way of talking, hearing waht I say?

How are you, my fine follow fellowers? You will see that life at King of Blooggging Headquarters is sallying forth like ship upon foam, quoitng as I am that fine Russian rock adn roller Mr. Ivan Morrison. You kno whow it is said that picture is worth thousand words and you will notice that ci have coimmmeters and fellowers now on King of Bloogging Blloggosphere, likewise I am told that 1 comment is worth millions hits, as so the same with the sam eo ffellwoers. These numbers exponate on themselves like fertle rabbits and soon countryside is overrrun by enoirmity of number s of fleoowers and commeneters of latest and greatest Blog Of Nate!!! We are closing in on immortality, meine freunde! Meanwhile at back of the ranch, we will enjoy quietr times of leisure as numbers languish in low millions of hits and we can tlak about the turleys in the bye and bye. I am unusually sympathetic to the lovelieness of this prospective prospect. Rejoicing may be in the order of things of the order.

Breaks, pargarpjs breaks you have been wondertign about and this I am saying was bagatelle of serious matzoh balls before the shocking truth of unnecessity of they are, thouhg nto a bad thing, just an unnecessity they are. But I like enter button so

I may occasionally still drop them like bits o' honey into text of the Almighty King. Persaonlitty is utmost of the everythign in the field of bloogigign I am now convinced.

Concieve as you will is the motto of the day of the King!

Peopleof the King! How about them puppies? Do we want more? Do you want 101 dalmations-worth fo puppiees running amok? Do we want anime or Archie comics? Maybe it is Betty and Veronica you are thinking anf i am provoding! This can be had, as King of Bllooggging is all about cusitomre servcie! Amd that is also Kingof Blooogigogg's motto of the day. Or yesterdya.

I am happy fo the positivity of things in the life of Kingly Blooggging, and so I hope are ytou. Fuuture I am convicned must also hold videos of Rocka nad Roll Hall of Famers Coswills singing "Rain, Macarthur's Park, and Everyhting" as groovy we danced to under black lights of Teen Canteen, checking out sexy laundry lint and dandruff on dates and finest dancers west of Soul Train, as a'rockin and a'reelin, Barabra Ann we were groovin on dance floor.

One last question to fellowers of King of Bloogigng! How is it we can have day jobs when vying for Blog of Nate is full time job, so that almost not even time to go to the water closet there is not. I am discreeet King with discreeet mention to the idea of needing to water cloister going. These are the importnnant qestuios of the day beyond eeven reincarnation today I am telling you, so steady line of response from feloowers of Nate are encourageds to their wisdom proffer and for you wishjng of a King Cake baby I am wishing for you even if I do not you send.

Blessings to you, my KIngs and Queens of Nate! A new wolrd we are making!

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Famous! Second Days!

Oh, my goodness, loyal subjects and followers of the me, Mr Zerosumgame, soon to be better known as King of Blogging! Soon to be better known to Others, since to the Millions of me and followers and readers and all around family people who love the joy of the King of Blogging's, I am already known, yes!?! As we careen and carouse through space of King of Blogging-fame, we will joyously await the coming of the Glorious Deus Ex Machina, doing business as (DBA) the mighty Blog of Nate. Once again, I am at first sorry that my fingers keep typing Blog of Nate, when I am thiunking that I mean Blog of Note, but since my fingers keep on making this error, I am thinking maybe error it is not, maybe there is a higghher power over even the Blogs of Note, and why not it woudl be - sorry, I am thinking tht a

parghraph break is in order here, so I will make
one, to further disable the eye of the beholders of my Kingsomeness! But, back to business of hands, the notion of the Blogs of Nate as hugher designation than the middle management level of Blogs of Note. If the case that is, then you can sign me ups right now for that Blogs of Nate ribbon: I'll take a dozen and you can hodl the mayo, please kind sirs and sirresses fo the Blogs of Note/Nate desigNATErs! I am honored. Remember that, in addition to claiming divinme designation of King of Blogging, I am also wanting this Blog fo Nate to be a gift for HUmanKinds! So, listen up, my children, and you shall hear

paragraph brreak

of the mifdnight ride of
how I came to see in my research that BlooggerFreinds are philosophers and they ask me, even the King of Blogging a very important question: "What is following?" they ask on HELP page, and I am thinking this is easily answered, but no, it appears that simple matter of walking after another perosn it is not. I must learn art of flollowing, an art that my feet incased in Stan Smith lounge lizard shoes apparently do not know, without guidcnae of my Freidns at Bloogger! Loyal readers will recall that I ran oiut immediatelyt and began to foloow other Blogs of Note and such bloogging roylaty to see my yellow zero in their midst was exciting, but in time I have second feelings and I am thinking that this is maybe stalking or filling Royal Mailboxes (remember i am senstievt to mailboxes because of Cosuin Kenny Ostensible, King of Mail Art!) with a whole lotta junk mail without really asking permission, so I come up with novel idea and decide to follow myself!!!!!!!!!! Yes, I agree to be my very first follower: who better, I am thinging, to follwow myself than myself!! King folowoing King!!!I will learn from myself as I teach myself what is necessary to become Blog of Nate!! But

paragraph break

lo and behokld, over the ocean comes one Z of A, who whhispers that follower she too will be and already I am feeling that Blog of Nate is just around the corner of infinate fame, how are we? And I visit this Duchess of bloogging becasue I feel that she is Blog of Nate herself, so I ask for eternal Nate-wisdom and she tells me that I am on righjt track with my Self_Esteen desigNATEion, but maybe I could stop yelling in her ear of which for I am very sorry and proimise again never to be agian doing to such a Duchess of Nate!! Though enthusiatsic of her praise I will forever be!
I am thinking that maybe advice is due to folowores and loyal subject sof King of Bloogging and other desirers of Blog of Nate:

1. As Miss Z of A tells me, you must call yoursefl who you are as soon as you are it! There is no waiting around for Kings of Bloogging to beocme Kings of Bloogging! You are it, then you are it!!

2. Begin immmediiately to include

pargapgh breaks,

but do not hesitate to jump right in wiht the Anime puppies, too for the canine lover subjects of the King of Bloogging!

Thirdly, let your fingers do the walking: it seems my fingers have uncovered next big life seceret after Code of Da Vinci, with discovery of Blog of Nate! Like the muffin man, I am after that bowl of melted butta!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Famous! Beginnings!

Good evenings! Probably you don't know me, but probably you do know my cousin Kenny Ostensible, the King of Mail Art! I know what you are thinking, but he is not that kind of male. He is truly King of Mail Art and he works very hard for such a distinction, I can only wish that I some day am King of Something, King of Blogger, King of Mozilla, King of Fruit Bats. I am assuming to be King of Anything takes much work, and boy howdy am I ready to give it a go, you don't know how I yearn for King of Blogging, it would so much make Thanksgiving at Kenny's house that much better, maybe then I can at least carve the turkey just once, instead of just opening up the cranbeery sauce cans with that big embarrassing schloooop! sound that comes out. I am not an envious man by habit, but I have to say that Kenny's conquering of Mail Art world made me sit back and wonder about the course of my life. He even has school of art named after him, name of Ostensiblism. There are a lot of blogs out there in this big bad world, I would settle for just one crayon to be named after me, a light yellow, Mr. Crayola, how about that, we call it, Zerosum, makes you think of delicate lemon yellow, color of cardboard cookies at local Wal-MarTgrocery (maybe I have aisle of Wal-MarT named after me, instead of maraschino cherries on Aisle 4, there is law that maraschino cherries are on Aisle Zerosum, King of Blogging). I see that there is such a thing as "Blogs of Note," I see that millions of people take opinion of Blogs of Noters and run like lemmings to touch the hem of these Kings and Queens of Blogging, I am wondering what is it makes these Kings and Queens gain the well-nourished fame of that they are so deserving of that. Is it pictures? Occasional

paragraphing breaks? Puppies? Anime portraits of puppies with

more paragraph breaks? I am thinking that I must become Followers to study the Kings and Queens about their blogging of noting, since sure as hell cousin Kenny never gave me a thin dime's worth of advice on how to become rising royalty, friend of Ray Johnson, Mail Artist to the Stars.

Today begins the next day of the days of my life as polar explorer of the Blogs of Note. There must be wisdom to be found if I am willing to set aside my sizeable Rhode Island-sized ego to learn from masters and mistresses. Then, when I am King of Blogging, I will share all of wisdom gained for the benefit of HumansKind and I will have followers to view all of which you will have to go on summer vacation all to scroll

through. For this and many other things, I will

learn the

fine art of para

graph break


Peace to you all, future followers of the King of Blogging!! I am excited to be with you!

Sincerely Very Best Regards, Fellow Bloggers!